Teacher, do you know what my mommy told me?

During our Relief Society meeting today (that's the women's class at church for the uninitiated) the sisters were given the opportunity to share their thoughts and testimonies about Our Savior and His gospel.  I love to share my thoughts via the written word but I'm not always so comfortable in front of a crowd so I stayed pretty glued to my seat and listened quite contently to the other women share their experiences.   

The first one up today was Ika's primary teacher.  She shared that today she taught her class about testimonies.  "What is a testimony?" was going to be her topic, but like a good teacher who is in tune with the spirit she quickly realized that today her 4, 5, and 6 year olds were going to steer their discussion.  They had a visitor.  She told us about how she started to introduce him to the others, but then gestured toward me, "Ika is Bonnie's son."  She looked right at me, "And you know how he is.  He is something else!" My eyes get wide and I catch my breath. Oh, no. She went on to say my son spoke up immediately about the new kid, "I know him!  He's cool!"  

Teacher, "You think he's cool, Ika?"  

Ika, "Yeah!"  

Teacher, "I think he's cool, too! Do you guys want to be cool like 

him?"  

The whole class cheers, "Yes!"  

Ika says, "Teacher, do you know what my mommy told me?"  

Now, mind you, this story is being relayed to us in our class.  I am hearing this for the first time with everyone else.  At this point I'm cringing!  Ika is 4 and I am a bit of a loose cannon at home.  I kid with my children and joke around with them constantly.  Sometimes I am sarcastic and sometimes I am no nonsense. No matter which kid you're talking about, if any of them were to say in public, "Do you know what my mommy told me?"  I'd want to die right there!  Any number of things could follow that statement! But what she said next made me want to cry.  

Ika, "My mommy told me that Heavenly Father is cool.  And she said that He loves me. I want to be cool like Him, too."  

She then took her cue from my sweet Ika and parlayed that into how "cool" Our Father in Heaven is and how we can all be cool like him and following Him and believing in Him is very cool.  

I can't begin to tell you how often I doubt myself.  I second guess everything about my parenting style.  Am I doing anything right?  What am I doing that my children are silently vowing to never repeat with their own children someday?  Are they happy?  Am I too hard on them? Am I too lenient?  Do they feel loved?  I believe in Christ, but am I doing enough to teach them about Him?  Have my choices and actions helped to build their foundations on a rock or on sand?  And then every once in a while a moment like this comes along where someone outside of our bubble will tell me of something that happened with them and then this stillness comes over me.  Suddenly, I'm soaking in every word and I truly start to question if this is just a dream. Did I just make this up?  Did she?  But today it was in public.  There were others around.  I didn't even know she was in the room, let alone going up to bare her testimony.  She had no reason to tell a tall tale about my son.  This was an unprovoked truth being shared.  And just like that, the Lord used this woman to fill my cup.  They're okay.  I'm not doing a terrible job.  They know that Heavenly Father loves them, and I am the one that did that.  I planted the seed.  I am not a perfect anything… Blogger, mother, wife, daughter.  But the Lord sees me and is mindful of me and my doubts and He sent that woman into my class today to give me a sign that I am headed in the right direction. 

This is my testimony of my Father in Heaven. He lives. And He is cool.  

Amen.